Tuesday, 11 April 2017

I- Identity


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Recently, I met a girl who goes door to door to give salon services to people right at their home, trying to meet her ends meet. The pricing of her products is way cheaper than you can ever expect but the work she does is beyond excellent!

Getting your arms and legs waxed at as low as 200 bucks! What, is it 1990 or something?

Yup that’s true and now you can close your wide open mouth!

She’s married right now but didn’t stop with her work. There was a lot of hassle that her family had to face in getting her married. Why you wonder? A couple of reasons there are.

One, she is black! And by black, I mean a shade just lighter than hair. Two, she has a big scar on her face because of an accident she met when she was a child. And it hasn’t healed as yet. Enough reasons to not get tied, right?

After stuffing tons of dowry, she finally got married. Like every one of us, she too had lots of dreams. She wasn’t very fond of her work and thought of quitting it after marriage.
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But fate had different plans for her. Her husband made good money but didn’t give her a single penny. And on top of that, she couldn’t produce children. Her in-laws kept saying bitter things to her every now and then and once tried to burn her as well, for she wasn’t good looking, she had scars and now she couldn’t give them their heir! Basically, she was good for nothing in their family and there was no use of her in the house.

She couldn’t go back to her parents. They wouldn’t take her. She didn’t have the audacity to leave her husband.

With a lot of courage, she decided to start the parlor services by going door to door, so that she could have something in her pocket. But there too, she couldn’t try her luck much! Even after being a pro, not many people wanted to get the services done by her because of the way she looked! What will others think? What kind of people do we call in our houses? The ladies of the society, what will they make out of us if they come to know about it? And so on...

That was the reason behind charging peanuts from her customers. At least, in the lure of cheap services, they would give her some work!

It took a really long time in the neighborhood to accept the way she was.

But because her work was good, she kind of survived and now keeps busy all day. She leaves her house at 11 in the morning and comes home at 9. She has a new identity now. An identity she created for herself.

Anyone who wanted to call her would ask in the neighborhood for the ‘ugly, black parlor girl, one who provides services at cheaper prices’!

And she didn’t mind any of it for she was getting work and that is what mattered!

And there I was, so much pinched, filled with so much agony about how shallow have we become as humans! I saw her struggle, I saw her commitment, beyond the color and the scar, I saw the desire in her to make a good life and for that, she was willing to go any level. But none of that helped. Because most of her clients couldn’t look beyond her skin tone!

We only see what is shown and never look beyond that. We only think about ourselves and crib if things don’t work our way. So much blessed we are for the kind of life we have and still we don’t feel happy! I read this somewhere and it makes so much sense, that I’d like to share it here.

‘People were meant to be loved and things were meant to be used. We live in times where things are being loved and people are being used!’

Can you resonate with this post? Tell me more about it!

Cheers
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------This A to Z Challengeseason I’m going to give you a ride and take you to all the places untouched! My theme this year is Let’s see the other Side’where I’ll be sharing about the daily nuances that we’ve been seeing in the same way since 1990’s! (:P) But this time you’re going to ponder over it a bit differently.

Stay tuned to find out what's more in store!

39 Discussion

  1. Oh wow... ,made me a bit sad to read... not very familiar to me... but I am a strong believer of .... what the hell does it matter what you look like...??! Chemistry and personality- that¨s my thing:-) Well-written piece, Geets:-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Eli :) I'm glad you liked it :)

      Cheers

      Delete
  2. I feel so bad for her. How quickly people judge based on Color and appearance. They never think of looking beyond that either! :(

    Introvert's Life

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sad but true! Good, that she is making her life!

      Cheers

      Delete
  3. What a strong woman- kudos to her for her strngth and not giving up!
    Yes we are shallow and do live with our prejudices - which is a damn shame!

    Theme: Peregrination Chronicles (travel)
    I is for innovation or Jugaad which we Indians are very famous for #atozchallenge

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And it happens almost everywhere!

      Cheers

      Delete
  4. My heart goes out to such people who are ignored and looked down upon by our so called "sanskruti" laden society. I sometimes feel we are the most racist of the races and simply blame the west.

    I felt very sad for the girl mentioned in your post. Thanks for sharing such a wonderful post Geetika. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks a ton, Dipanwita :) I'm happy to bring it out and share with everyone!

      Cheers

      Delete
  5. Physical appearances have taken over our perception so much. sad.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And yet, there is no improvement, whatsoever!

      Cheers

      Delete
  6. You have raised multiple issues prevailing in society with his one post and that is colour of the skin, dowry and about the status husbands give their wives. kudos to this lady that she is working hard and making her own money .Feel sad that people around still tag her with the colour of her skin and not with the work she does

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I feel so proud of her and get so much of inspiration from her!

      Cheers

      Delete
  7. More power to her! It's sad how we judge people on the basis of color and how they look. Good that she has a job and she's good at it, enough to prove people wrong.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes! And she is doing really great for herself!

      Cheers

      Delete
  8. Yes I did buddy but sad to say that beauty is not skin deep in our society. Why are we judged based on our exteriors. She definitely deserved better. My heart goes out to her.

    ReplyDelete
  9. More power to her ! I admire her for rising above her 'disabilities' and carving out an identity for herself. I hope that one day she gets what she really deserves .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hopefully, she will, one day, some day!

      Cheers

      Delete
  10. Till when we will call someone as ugly and black. It's so shameful in present day! It tanks the heart to see so much of prejudice. She is way more powerful than the rest in not letting herself to be cluttered and making things move for her. She deserves respect.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. True in every sense, Vishal! I am happy that she is making a life of her own!

      Cheers

      Delete
  11. I wish people would stop judging others - especially women - on the way they look. It's the most superficial thing and it's sickening. Good on her for pursuing ways to meet her goals!

    Inverted Refrain - Numb

    ReplyDelete
  12. I am so glad that she is strong and has worked hard to be financially independent. People can be so worthless at times. The quote is so powerful and apt.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Raj! Glad to know you found it apt!

      Cheers

      Delete
  13. I have a similar "parlour lady" in my building too... minus the scars. She has been working here (door-to-door, at throwaway prices) since before she got married. Earlier, she used to come in salwar suit, now she comes in sari. That's the only change.
    People judge other people for any excuse they can find, and not just looks. Anybody who is different is judged. For example, me... for not being married. It's how are society is. I guess we are scared of anyone who is different.
    Happy AtoZing!
    Chicky @ www.mysteriouskaddu.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah! That is how it functions around us. Married not married, kids or without kids, working or not working, black or white... people need something or the other to talk about!

      Cheers

      Delete
  14. What awful people to judge someone based on their skin colour and a scar! I think its clear who the real ugly people in this story are!
    Debbie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yet, no one to show them the right mirror!

      Cheers

      Delete
  15. It's a pity we still look at a person's skin colour. It's sad and yet it is the truth.

    Shubhangi @ The Little Princess

    ReplyDelete
  16. I loved the quote in the end Geet. so true, we judge people by looks and never look whats inside. A sad reality !

    ReplyDelete
  17. That's sad that people judge by looks and not by talents and skills. Glad that she has carved an identity for herself despite all odds. Love that quote in the end... it's a grim reality of our times.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Indians are the people who boast the most about culture and relationships, all empty talk. Disgusting, really!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Everything is hollow from inside if you take a closer look!

      Cheers

      Delete
  19. That is such a sad one but I am not surprised. What makes me really happy is that she is fighting for her identity. Loved that quote. So true to our times.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Oh my God! The quote at the end just rips one's heart out! This is so true!! We love our matoetal things more than we care for people! What a sad world we live in!

    ReplyDelete

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